STOP THE RIDE I WANT TO GET OFF!

Here I am looking young and moody.

Hello, fact fans! Welcome to another edition of 'You Couldn't Make It Up!' with me your host, Terence Trent D'Arby. I once asked you to sign your name across my heart, but today, I want to fire facts at your face with my brain. But to make it more exciting, I've turned it into a fun multiple choice quiz! How could you possibly not enjoy this?! As usual, the winner gets to go for tea with me sometime next week AND receives a signed copy of Sign Your Name on cassette. Ready? Okay, let's go!

ROUND ONE: The Truth is Out There
This first round looks at weird news from around the world. Everything is true, because it was on the news!

1. A baby was born in Guatamela last year with three...whats?
a) Heads
b) Feet
c) Eyes
d) Dogs

2. Californian surfer Doug Henderson lost three minutes of his life in April this year when he...what?
a) Got abducted by aliens
b) Banged his head on a surfboard and nearly drowned
c) Was asphyxiated by an amorous shark when it tried to kiss him, and in doing so swallowed up his entire head
d) His watch got too wet and stopped for three minutes

3. An elderly woman in Essex stopped a bank robbery two weeks ago by...what?
a) Calling the police
b) Farting loudly
c) Giving the robbers a good telling off
d) Singing 'Sign Your Name Across My Heart'

ROUND TWO: Animal Habits
We all love animals. Some more than others. Can you guess the correct answers to these crazy facts about animals?????

4. A boa constrictor is often thought as being a snake, when it is actually a...what?
a) Snake
b) Legless lizard
c) Giant worm
d) Bird

5. Lions mate for life. Tigers, however, have the highest...what?
a) Birth rate
b) Libido
c) Opinion of women
d) Divorce rates of any big cat

6. Crabs walk sideways. What other animal is famous for walking in a funny way?
a) Robocop
b) John Cleese
c) Ostrich
d) Sloth

ROUND THREE: The Big Money Round!
Get a right answer in this general knowledge section and you double your winnings!!!!!!!!

7. Terence Trent D'Arby had a hit with...what?
a) Sign Your Name
b) Sign Your Name
c) Sign Your Name
d) Sign Your Name

I'm really lonely, and have a lot of tapes to get rid off, but that doesn't inform the question. I promise.

ROUND FOUR: Reverse Pot Luck
In a unique spin, you have to guess the WRONG answers for this round! I know - it's topsy turvy!

8. Johnny Cash was a...what?
a) Singer
b) Guitarist
c) Drunk
d) Paedophile

9. Matthew Kelly presented a show called...what?
a) You Bet
b) Stars in Their Eyes
c) Stars in Their Eyes Celebrity Special
d) Kids on Drugs

10. Terence Trent D'Arby is...what?
a) An underrated and oft-overlooked singer/songwriter
b) Often mistaken for Seal, when Seal had hair.
c) Sexy in AND out of his clothes
d) A trained pilot

How do you think you did? Send your answers on the back of a postcard to the usual address by midnight next week and I'll announce the winner afterwards!

This is Terence Trent D'Arby signing HIS name across YOUR heart AND signing off!

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